But you will notice, (a) one does not have command of the English language, and (b) one is a boy.
I need a few more of the adult female variety.
Other helpful characteristics beyond adultness and femaleness: lives in Tallahassee, has a flexible schedule (because I don't), love of walks, Chick Fil A shakes, and/or American Idol. Does not live in the dreaded Talla Villa, the inevitable destination of 95% of young LDS mothers, that is one million light years away from my house.
I just need to get out more.