Tyler got our Christmas lights up, which leads me to a couple of observations.
1. There was a time that Tyler being grumpy about putting Christmas lights up would have sent me into a mental spiral, with thoughts such as "why doesn't he like me" and "it's not MY fault we have to do Christmas lights" and "he's being really unfair to me, I do a ton around here," and so on.
Now I just think, "he doesn't like putting up Christmas lights." As my mom said, Marriage! The College of Life!
2. This made me physically ill.
Because I love him, yes. But also because please, please do not leave me here alone with these children.
I was 31 years old when I got married. I lived in New York City, for crying out loud. With nothing but a roommate and some cooking knives. Then I get married. And if he's ever out of town and I'm alone in the house with the kids I am terrified.
That is only one of the many ways I depend on him. I know that if he weren't here I would survive and even surprise myself with what I am capable of. But he is here, and I am disturbingly dependent.
The good news is, he's dependent on me. Ha!
1. There was a time that Tyler being grumpy about putting Christmas lights up would have sent me into a mental spiral, with thoughts such as "why doesn't he like me" and "it's not MY fault we have to do Christmas lights" and "he's being really unfair to me, I do a ton around here," and so on.
Now I just think, "he doesn't like putting up Christmas lights." As my mom said, Marriage! The College of Life!
2. This made me physically ill.
Because I love him, yes. But also because please, please do not leave me here alone with these children.
I was 31 years old when I got married. I lived in New York City, for crying out loud. With nothing but a roommate and some cooking knives. Then I get married. And if he's ever out of town and I'm alone in the house with the kids I am terrified.
That is only one of the many ways I depend on him. I know that if he weren't here I would survive and even surprise myself with what I am capable of. But he is here, and I am disturbingly dependent.
The good news is, he's dependent on me. Ha!
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