BMW Chronicles

As you may know, we bought a BMW.

Tyler's loves have always gone as follows:

1. Me and the kids
2. Lawn

Don't think I don't wonder if it's secretly switched sometimes.

Then here comes BMW. Gliding into our lives (because it's so quiet, see?), proud and gleaming. BMW is better than you. You will have to work hard to live up to BMW's standards. When I drive it (which generally I'm really afraid to do), I expect at any moment it will start talking to me in some kind of detached, "2001" manner, calmly enumerating all the things I'm doing wrong.

I took BMW to play tennis with my friend, Jodi. But where to park it? Perhaps on the street.


I'm sorry, are we cave men?


After much deliberation, I snuck it behind some recycling bins. We must protect our precious.

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